Things they don’t tell you when you move cities and leave your home:
It’s hard to keep up with people and even harder to keep up with people you left behind.
Conversations change. There’s small talk, a lot of it and you will do more of it even though it’s the one thing you hate the most in the world. You probably took all the people you had for granted and thought things were pretty steady and permanent.
The culture, the facilities and the language of the place you move determines how you’ll communicate. On one hand, maybe they’re friendlier, on the other you don’t find yourself really talking. Phone calls back home increase in number and your best friend wonders if you’re sane.
You can live with strangers and not know each other.
Sometimes, at 2 AM, you wish that maybe, instead of calling your best friend to tell them about how your boss sucks, you’d rather tell him/her, but something tells you he/she doesn’t want to hear it, or cares. This isn’t college. You’re on your own and you are your own team and that isn’t necessarily sad. It just means that everyone is fighting a battle of their own like you are and finding people, who might prioritize you in the midst of that, will take time.
Doing your laundry on the weekends is more important than going clubbing. You probably don’t have the money anyway. Or people to go with. Yet. Let’s not forget all the food you’ll burn while you learn cooking.
You start to find happiness in the small things.
When someone asks you if you’re okay or gets you a cup of coffee when you need it the most, it makes your heart flutter and the kindness can seem overwhelming. You constantly believe you’re alone and in moments like these you’re a part of something bigger than yourself. You start to see the poor and the abandoned and there’s a feeling of relief that you really do have so much going for you, more than you thought. You become kinder and understand how much more the world needs it, need you, even.
You don’t have as much time as you think.
You forget on a few days that as you grow old, so do your parents. Weirdly enough, for a kid that spent so much time in her room at home, you’ll call them whenever you can. Saying good night matters. Checking up on them to see if their health is alright becomes imperative. In the end, maybe we do become our parents after all. For all the times we thought we’d never make the same decisions they would, you start to understand them and your roots too.
Tough times don’t last, but tough people do.
You will become someone who says– “Got work now. Will talk to you later”. And sometimes later might mean, on the weekends and sometimes in months. Making time for people won’t be as easy as it used to be. There will be nights when the work isn’t done and all you want to do is sleep and listening to another’s problem isn’t something you’re up for. Life will filter people out before you and while it’ll hurt at first, weren’t you always better off being around those who understand you and know why you work so hard? Some bonds defy time and places and they will stay.
No matter where you go, you pick your people, no questions asked. Some people are worth leaving behind everything behind for.
Take care of yourself.
All that work and money will not matter if you’re not okay. Eating Maggi all week won’t really do your body any good when you’re 30. Mental health counts just the same. Solve issues in real time before it’s too much one morning. Exercise. Socialize. Do self-care. If you had to name the top five things on your priority list, how long would it take before you named yourself?
Don’t judge a book by its cover.
I guess the cute guy/girl opposite your desk at work can smile after all.😉✌️
So, Go with the flow!🙂